I have been doing this statcounter thing on my blog for a little while. It is extremeley interesteing to see some of the stats. Most people visit my blog through John Totten and his College tower. The rest are from all over the place. It you are one of the people visiting from jacksonville, Virginia or parts unknown drop me a line. I would love to hear from you. It is just an interesting thing for me to see. I hope i can entertain you all more in the future. For those visitors who dont know me i am sure this is a strange blog to visit, For those visitors who do know me i am sure this is more strange of a blog to visit. Well i thought i would just let you all in on what i was thinking. Oh yeah i quit smoking, kind of. So dont offer me a cigarette unless you want me to kick you. And if i seem alittle more crabby then normal, it is because my body is going through somw serious withdrawl. Yeah and i saw a baby crawling across my ceiling last night when i was locked into my room.
Take it easy
I have spent many hours laying in a hamock pondering the great questions of the universe. Like if a man was able to lick his own elbow, would it taste different then his wrist? Who knows? There are to many un asnswered questions and i am just one man. Sometimes i wonder what it would be like if i was two men. Would that be cool or would it completely suck. And i am not talking about a clone or anything, i mean two exact people. Exact same experiences and everything, oh thats creepy. My buddy David Littlejohn has often times talked about how much he loves ice cream. I never really knew why he would always talk about ice cream, until the other day. I was talking to him on the phone when he said something about wanting some Rocky Road. This statement sparked my little brain a spinnin. I thought back to all the times he has said something about ice cream. Then i remebered this one time he pointed to a can of motor oil and called it ice cream. Man did that ever blow my mind. I really did not know what to think about it. So i came up with this conclusion. when a man wants something really badly he must fight for it. whether this means risking his life or just merely looking stupid. Take from this what you will, but just dont ask me to help you out.
Where do you think that lightning bugs go to plug in. I heard one time, from this old guy fixing his flat tire on the side of the road, "when lighting bugs loose power they head to the great refueling station in the sky." I did not know what to think of this, see i was oly 7 years old. But now with my knowledge i have acrued in my old age, i have realized that when there is lightning in the sky that is the lighting bugs plugging in.
Well It is that most anticipated time. For all my dedicated fans Ralph is back. For those of you who know not what I speak of, then check out the first part of the story in my blog titled, "In the time of Chimpanzees i was an Astronaut"
Well I hope you likey, not really i do not do this for you guys, I have strange selfish reasons behind all of this.
With the relief of number one being finished Ralph was excited. He had been dreaming about the second item on his itinerary all night. Your guess is as good as mine as to why he would be dreaming about his itinerary all night. Well maybe my guess is a little better then yours. I do have the upper hand by being the author of the story. But i am not going to stop you from guessing. So go on i will take a minute to let you guess your little brains out. Ok times up. If you could not formulate a good enough guess in that time then you do not deserve to guess. So back to Ralph. The sun now has risen to about a quarter the way up the blinds and has pierced its way through the bent blinds. The shadow of Ralph is vivid on the back wall of the dinning room. The image looks as if it is burnt on the wall. The dark shadow shows the image of a man standing defeated next to a trash can, that has his breakfast in it.
Ralph glanced at his watch and then to his itinerary. He realized it was time to leave. So Ralph went to his room to dress. Ralph quizickly stared into his clostet. He could not figure out how to dress for a visit to the bank. See today Ralph is off to the bank down the street to get a loan. You may laugh, Ralph get a loan Ha. But yes that was on his itinerary and Ralph is a slave to the words on his page. Raplhs stomached Churned, he was still starving. He had, had nothhing to eat since dinner last night He was thinking about his breakfast he had just swept into the trash. Ralph was not sure he was going to be able to make it to the bank before his body started to eat its self from within. But with haste Ralph trained his mind to the task at hand. "I must get dressed the bank is where i need to be." Ralph mused.
Ralph quickly dressed and headed out the door with his un matched socks his brown suit pants and his typical white ragged t-shirt. Ralph walked with hurried steps His stomach was now growling with anticipation for his next meal. Ralph could not help, but think, "How long can one man go without food, especially one with such a full day?" The mess had been cleaned, but the void in his stomach would not let him forget his spilled cereal. Ralph tried to force the thought of food out of his mind. He had more important things to think about. The next item on the itinerary might be hard to achieve. Ralph needed to get a loan. May seem like a simple task, but Ralphs credit is almost as bad as mine.
As Ralph sees the bank approaching quickly he begins to get anxious. The sweat begins to course down his face with much the intensity of a Mississippi tributary, before all the locks and damns(much like in Twains days). So as you can imagine that is a lot of sweat. Most the persperation is from the walking, but the anxiety carries some blame for the sweat stain building on Ralphs collar. As our hero reached the door to the bank he sees his reflection in the glass, he can not help but notice he put his shirt on backwards. So Ralph immediately turns around to fix his shirt. He heads for the other side of the parking lot decides it would not be proper to take his shirt off and adjust it in the parking lot. As he notices the gas station next door he decides he can use the bathroom there. So Ralph finishes the walk across the bank lot and into the gas stained asphalt of the gas station. the Sun is beating done now and the Gas smell is pungent in the air. The old tar like gas stains reveal a twinkle. Ralph looks down to see a shiny quarter stuck in the sticky goo. He bends down to pick the quarter up. Oh no, Ralph thinks to himself as he feels the seat of his pants open up to reveal his heart boxers.
Ralph panics and does not know what to do. He arches his back and spins his head to see the damage. He notices that the hole is to big to hide. How can he go into the bank with a hole in his pants? Ralph has to make the desicion on the fly whether to head home, which if he does he misses the chance to get the loan, or he could go inside, which if he chooses he riskes being embarrased. What to do what to do? Ralph decides the embarrasment is not worth it, so he heads home.
The trip home is much shorter then the trip to the bank. Ralph walks with a quick and nervous gait. As Ralph arrives at the door and sureys the bust of a trip, he is reminded of his hunger as his stomachs gives up a huge growl. You must be thinking, why does ralph not just make a sandwich or something when he gets in the house. Well hold on, i am getting there.
As you remember Ralph follows his itinerary religously. So for the past week Ralph forgot to pencil in time to go to the grocery store. He thought he figured out a way around that, when last night he planned to get the loan today. But because of the mishaps of the day Ralph must forfeit that item on the itenerary. I will go ahead and let you in on the next item on the itenarary after the trip to the bank. Ralph was going to go to McDonalds to get a big mac. he planned only to get a loan for the amount of the value meal. Hopefully Ralph can better schedule his day tommorow, but who knows.
Until next time remember, dont schedule yourself so strictly or so stupidly.
Bye
i know it has been a long time and i have been promising a lot of people a new installment to my story. I am sorry to say, I have nothing for you. I do have a new nephew, Jaron Mosi Huffine. yes my brother Ben is a Dad now. How scary is that. Jaron is great he has some huge feet and hands for a little baby. He is also reading at a more advanced level then i am, but that is not saying much. Well for those of you i have not seen since i got back from Texaas, give me a call. I had to take a week to recover. Well I will give you all a second installment soon, but for now just keep on keepin on. However you do that. Peace